Tag Archives: anxiety

Workplace blues

Image from aromaticwisdominstitute.com
Image from aromaticwisdominstitute.com

Lost the love for your job? wanted to leave for a while but have continued to stay because you kept thinking you saw a light at the end of the tunnel?

I have decided this is quite like a relationship well past its expiry date. You keep thinking it will get better, you remember how it used to be, and you are sure (sort of) that it will get better again and you can go back to skipping into work on a sea of rainbows followed by chirping baby birds… maybe you have been thinking this for months… years even.

Instead you find yourself feeling sick at the thought of returning to work on Monday. There are periods of hope where you don’t have to force that smile, and you may not actually have an issue with doing a few extra hours to help out. After a while, you realise that these hopes are indeed false, and you are disappointed… again. You gradually realise that the promises of change, although well-intentioned and full of hope and sunshine are probably a far cry from what will actually happen, if anything changes at all… and you feel foolish for deciding to stay and ride out the rough patch (after all, fool you once shame on them, fool you twice…).

Toxic waste only turns your into a superhuman hero in the movies, toxic waste in your gut will just get you an ulcer. Not to mention, everyone around you is probably sick of hearing about it.

Sure, it would be better if you won lotto and quit working all together in favour of seeking out the best Mojito worldwide… but this is reality. So until then, at least find something that doesn’t make you want to blow your f&*king br&%ns out. Life is short, you gotta make it work for you.

Peace out Rockstars,

V

Keeping the focus on the end game – 11 months and counting…

Image taken from imgdumper.com
Image taken from imgdumper.com

Some goals are achieved within a day, or several days, some take years… in this case I am in my 6th and HOPEFULLY last year…!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have two core passions – music and the environment we live in, and given that don’t like the chances of becoming a wealthy rockstar any time soon, I am currently studying my other passion (the environment), with the idea in mind that I will move into some form of career at the end of it…

While I finish my degree, I work full time for a company I love, and hopefully will continue to work for when I graduate… which is GREAT, honestly and truly, I love the company and what they do. The trouble is, I am a person that needs some form of mental stimulation, variety, a different challenge once in a while. I have often joked that if I’m not moving – I’m asleep.

As I am currently only qualified to push paper, or run a restaurant, then that is exactly what I am limited to until graduation rolls around – COULD THIS YEAR MOVE ANY SLOWER?! The saying SSDD could not be more relevant… it has been the same for over 3 years now, and I’ve been digging deep to find my ‘happy-smiley work face’ for the last year of that. I’m soo close though! in 11 months I can finally exhale completely and move on to new and exciting goals!

Oh how sweet the taste of achievement will be! 6 years of…

  • Guilt because I don’t have enough time for my friends, family and boyfriend
  • Tears when the rest of my life started to implode right around exam time, because Murphy wouldn’t have it any other way
  • Stress-eating at midnight when I’m trying to finish an assignment at the last minute (which is really a day or two early but I know I won’t have time with the current deadlines at work)
  • Feeling guilty for stress eating but being too tired for the gym because I stayed up all night finishing my assignment then got up at 6am to get to work on time on the other side of the city, and essentially undermining one of my other goals (taking care of my health)
  • Being told by certain people in my life (of which I cannot choose), rather unhelpfully, that University is a waste of time and money
  • Generally questioning whether I had a screw loose when I started to embark on this journey, and whether I’ll even use the fan-dangly piece of paper I’m busting a proverbial nut for

Yes… sweeter than honey (or maple syrup for my vegan friends!). Eye on the prize…

Later Rockstars!

V

Plant based anxiety and a new year of university nerves

So I probably won’t be posting anything for the next couple of weeks as I will be in the middle of nowhere looking at rocks so that I can finish my degree at the end of the year!

I am booked to go do some of my practical assignments on a farm where the food is being provided, and I have promptly provided my details on the provided form, noting that don’t eat meat or dairy so I am curious to see how this will go… SURELY I am not the first to get difficult about the food situation?! As always I have thought ahead and started stashing snacks in my suitcase, though I’m not sure the dried peaches will make it to the trip…

WP_001201

I was a quite nervous about what the food would be, the questions which would follow and the disgusted looks and snickers at my potentially ‘boiled to mush’, thawed and reheated vege options… but after a little thought, I have decided that if it all goes to custard, at least I’ll have some snacks to tide me over, and it’s two weeks tops. Who knows, maybe they’ll surprise me with a lovingly cooked vege meal!? Fingers crossed…

After reading through our workbook, I doubt I will have much time to worry about food anyway. I guess that comes with the territory when you are receiving the same credits for a two-week course as you would for a full semester… you can probably expect a hefty workload! I think the pre-course nerves really set in when I was checking over the list of necessities to bring and I see “Torch – for working out in the field after 8pm”… AFTER 8pm. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not afraid of hard work and digging deep to get the work done, but when I see we may be out all night and still have notes, and the following reports, etc. to write up when we get back? Good lord…

It’ll be fine…

I think…

Maybe pray for me just in case…

Later Rockstars!

V